It has been a long long time since i last posted a blogpost.Trying to heal myself from the pain that nearly gave me a heart attack,which is still eating me from within.
Yes,I admit that im still very frustrated about the hard fact that im not getting anything.No scholarship,no matriculation..........nothing.Come on!!I deserved something better than this!!
And then finally........the fateful day has come to check the results of JPA.My hands were shaking and my legs were treeeeeeeeeembling uncontrollably when a friend of mine,purposely send a message for me from kl just to tell me that JPA results are out!Oh the message really 'brighten' up my day........but thank you so much for telling me.After the shocking news i nearly cracked the laptop into half,because i can't get into the stupid website.Than suddenly,i received a call.............
"Hello?Yo i finally get in the web!!Faster give me your ic number i help you check!!!!!!" ............. (obviously too boring and had nothing better to do...)
My larynx make out the 12 digits with some difficulties,and my heart was pumping harder it was suppose to be.
"Yeah,u didn't get it.Same as me wahaha...."She said something about appeal and names of the lucky one but my head was buzzing and i couldn't catch up with her sentences.I replied her with mainly 'oh' , 'ah' , 'mm' and the phone call ended without me saying byebye.
Its weird.A heart broken moment without tears to complete the picture.So i guess JPA stabs me in the heart,but not enough to bring me down.
2008年5月12日星期一
2008年5月1日星期四
Interview again!!!
5月5号，要去interview。
完全没有准备，不管是physically或mentally都没有。
If i get this scholarship,i'll be flying to somewhere far from malaysia and study overseas.
But...（why does good thing always comes with a but? ...ToT...)
after my studies,i'll have to come back(absolutely not whole heartedly...) and work as a MATH TEACHER,teaching those pathetic secondary school!! (at least my school is worse enough to call it pathetic...)
Working with the OMS government department is horrible...teaching in a school under the supervisation of the government is even worst!!!!!I'm not insulting those honourable teachers out there,who take up the responsibility to teach our future leader,but still i hate the idea of becoming a teacher...and certainly could not imagine myself being one.
Maybe some of you might ask why,if i hate being a teacher so much,did i apply the scholarship in the first place???Well,both of my parents are dedicated and responsible teachers,so they think i might inherited their 'teacher' genes in me and maybe later i'll realised being a teacher suits me afterall!!!Come on lah~~~even i myself does not believe that...
The interview consists of four parts,
1. INSAK test. Its like a sahsiah/moral test,useless...
2. Ujian penulisan bahasa ingerris.I can't write factual,oh god...
3. Individual interview.This is the part i fear most.I ruined my jpa interview before because i can't speak fluently due to my brain blockage.Unfortunately,history has the tendency to repeat themselves......
4. group interview.Well,i won't speak unless the interviewer asked me to.No problem...
May GOD bless me so that i won't throw face AGAIN infront of those anti-pig people.
Amen......
完全没有准备，不管是physically或mentally都没有。
If i get this scholarship,i'll be flying to somewhere far from malaysia and study overseas.
But...（why does good thing always comes with a but? ...ToT...)
after my studies,i'll have to come back(absolutely not whole heartedly...) and work as a MATH TEACHER,teaching those pathetic secondary school!! (at least my school is worse enough to call it pathetic...)
Working with the OMS government department is horrible...teaching in a school under the supervisation of the government is even worst!!!!!I'm not insulting those honourable teachers out there,who take up the responsibility to teach our future leader,but still i hate the idea of becoming a teacher...and certainly could not imagine myself being one.
Maybe some of you might ask why,if i hate being a teacher so much,did i apply the scholarship in the first place???Well,both of my parents are dedicated and responsible teachers,so they think i might inherited their 'teacher' genes in me and maybe later i'll realised being a teacher suits me afterall!!!Come on lah~~~even i myself does not believe that...
The interview consists of four parts,
1. INSAK test. Its like a sahsiah/moral test,useless...
2. Ujian penulisan bahasa ingerris.I can't write factual,oh god...
3. Individual interview.This is the part i fear most.I ruined my jpa interview before because i can't speak fluently due to my brain blockage.Unfortunately,history has the tendency to repeat themselves......
4. group interview.Well,i won't speak unless the interviewer asked me to.No problem...
May GOD bless me so that i won't throw face AGAIN infront of those anti-pig people.
Amen......
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